How to Pause Like a Positive Leader
There is an abundance of literature on mindfulness and “the power of the pause,” but what I want to outline for you is how to pause like a positive leader when things feel especially hard.
Pausing creates space for you and your people, and allows them not just to see things differently, but also to work together differently.
Like any practice, you can learn the basics before advancing and refining your technique.
The Basics
1. DISENGAGE
Choose to slow down or step back from an activity or plan.
2. OBSERVE
Occupy an alternate space or perspective from which you can observe, inquire, and gather new insight about your relationship to the problem and your people.
3. RE-ENGAGE
Return to the activity or plan with new insight and energy.
Beginning Your Practice
If you are just beginning, disengage by simply closing your eyes.
If you are in the presence of others, simply send your attention to where the wall and the ceiling meet.
Soften your gaze and allow yourself to shift into ‘observer’ mode. Observe the conversation that’s unfolding below. Observe your energy level. Observe the energy in the room and get curious…
What’s my relationship with [the problem] at this moment?
What work have I/we been avoiding?
What would create a sense of momentum?
Answering just one of these inquiries during a 2-3 minute pause can broaden your perspective…but the longer you linger and the more honestly you answer, the more you cultivate radical self-awareness, one of the four cornerstones of positive leadership!
Advancing Your Practice
If you are already comfortable hitting ‘pause,’ you can advance your practice by lengthening your pause and deepening your inquiry.
To do this, I recommend visiting the four cornerstone of positive leadership and observing from each one.
Here are some cornerstone inquiries that may be helpful:
1. CULTIVATE RADICAL SELF-AWARENESS
What are you most afraid of?
What are you holding too tightly?
What old story is coloring my/our experience in this moment?
2. PRACTICE COMPASSIONATE SELF-COMMAND
What permission have I/we been afraid to give?
What might happen if i/we did?
Will you do it?
3. EXPERIENCE WORK WITH YOUR PEOPLE
How do we feel about the information we have?
What strengths have I/we underutilized?
How would we be working if things were going in our favor?
4. DESIGN A BETTER FUTURE WHERE YOU ARE
What gifts are hidden inside this failure?
What’s still important and true?
If we proceed with forgiveness, what can we still create?
